Of strangers, space cadets and old ladies

“When I get down to my last dime I'll just walk over to skid row."
"There are some real weirdos down there."
"They're everywhere.”  -Charles Bukowski, Ham on Rye 

 Whoever makes those Walmart memes should mosey on down to the Dollartree and just stay a while. I started my glorious career as a Dollartree cashier in August. For some unknown reason, my till seems to attract the strangest, most...interesting people. As one of my managers often says, "We get a different kind of dumb here". Here is a glimpse into the world of the special breed of Dollartree customers.

On my fist day on the job, as I was learning the difficult art of the cash register, a man of about 40, with rather large arms, ambled up to the till. I scanned his purchases and took longer than I should have to ring it up. "Sorry", my manager smiled, "We're training". The man looked rather pleased, flexed his beefy biceps and said,"Yes! Yes, I have been training." Very nice.

Another man followed shortly after him. After scanning his ten packages of craft feathers and two tubes of glitter glue, I asked him if he was interested in purchasing our deal of the week, electronics wipes. He stared at them for few seconds, then at me. "Helen. Will those clean my spaceship?" Yes, they might, but will they cure your mind?

There is a rather large woman who comes by every now and then with her adopted son. He walks through the aisles singing loudly and talking to the little stuffed monkeys. They buy a great assortment of Old Dutch crisps and caramel supreme cookies and double  fudge brownies and other such calorie stuffed goodies. On occasion the mother will buy a few packets of chips that have the word slim on them and a diet coke to go with the case of Dr. Pepper. She is, I assume, making an effort to lose weight. After a few visits to the Dollartree, I stopped wondering about her deep voice and broad shoulders and rang her through with a smile. Then one day, in between begging for a chocolate bar and singing Amazing Grace at the top of his lungs, the little boy looked up at his mother and said,"Mommy, why in high school were you a boy and now you're a girl?"  I have no words.

Old ladies are the most entertaining, particularly those who are a little hard of hearing. One old lady sped her shopping cart through the aisle, loudly proclaiming to anyone withing earshot that this store is American and therefore does not carry the brand of tinned salmon she wanted! Unfortunately for me, I was in the aisle where the wrong tinned salmon was located, unpacking some spam onto the lowest shelves.
''Excuse me! Why are you on the floor??"
"Oh. I'm unpacking some things down here."
"WHAT?"
"I'm unpacking-"
"WHERE IS THE SALMON?"
"It's right over here."
"That's the wrong kind. THIS STORE MUST BE AMERICAN!! They are taking over EVERYTHING!"
"I'm sorry."
"WHAT? You're not American are you??"
"No ma'am, South African"
"Well. I will be making a strong suggestion to your manager that she FIRE YOU. Foreigners are taking over this country!"

Another older lady parked her buggy by till 3 even though till 1's light was on.
"I can help you on one" I said to her.
"That is NOT a one! That's a zero!"

Most recently, an old lady who bought over 24 tins of peas asked me to double bag her cans, so that the bag wouldn't rip while she carried them to the car. I did as she asked and handed them over. She narrowed her eyes at me and gave me a glimpse at a possible future. "Perhaps some day you too shall have artificial hips and be unable to bend over." Whatever happened to all the sweet old ladies?

 And that, ladies and gentlemen, is just a short compilation of many many stories I have to tell. If you are ever bored, come on down to the Dollartree. You won't be disappointed.

Shooting Germans

"I shoot people. Then I take them into dark rooms and blow them up."-Anonymous

Relax yourself. Yes I shot the Germans. But I did it with my Nikon D90 and a zoom lens. Sebastian and Luciana Zerm, Uncle and Aunt to my favourite baby girl (seen here eating raspberries), were kind enough to allow me to do a belated wedding photo shoot. They got married in Germany and came to Canada for a short visit. Between their German humour and my hard to understand accent, we had some fairly entertaining moments. Before we started, Sebastian told me several times that he was just so excited. I told him that's good and smiled and carried on with whatever I was doing. After about the tenth time, and him showing me his shaky hands, I realized that he meant nervous, not excited. Oops. "You're nervous? Haha! Good! Just what I like to hear."

Usually when I am shooting people, instead of posing them I tell them to "just be". I have a need,that I blame on my uncle Robin, to photograph people in their natural, unposed state. However, Sebastian and Luci's home language is German. So as I attempted to calm their modeling nerves with "Don't be nervous, just be" I sent Luci running, screaming "A bee!! A bee!". Cristina, her sister, ran in the opposite direction, "Waaaah. I hate bugs. Waaaah." Sebastian bravely stood his ground and brandished the lacy white umbrella, swinging it heroically at the menacing, non-existent bee. In spite of our faulty start, we did end up with a few nice shots.

Beautiful, happy Germans.

Right after the "bee". Look how well they composed themselves.

On the Quesnel walking bridge.

Awwww.

The shoes.

The bouquet.

Definitely not the best quality, but it is one of my favourites.

Sebastian's nerves have left him and his personality starts to take over.

Haha.

On a dock with Luci's older sister, Cristina.

Through the veil.

Lovely People.

Sour Raspberries

"Take delight in the ordinary."- Unknown

Sometimes I have wonderful epiphanies, which are admittedly less epic when typed out on a blog, that I share with the ever loving cyberspace. Other times I have a set of photographs that I think are quite nice that I want to show off. But then sometimes, like tonight, something ordinary will happen and I will find so much joy in it that I just have to share it.

Tonight at lifegroup, one of my favourite little kidlets, Alia, ate some sour raspberries. Her little face scrunched up and her tiny fists pressed against her eyes as the full horror of sour berries overwhelmed her. I grabbed my camera and attempted to capture her various contorted facial expressions, trying my best to keep the camera steady as we all laughed at her chubby legs kicking at this new taste sensation.

Like good friends and parents, we fed her berry after berry, taking advantage of her childlike faith in those who feed her. Thankful that Alia is so wonderfully gullible, we took great (perhaps too great) delight in her entertaining new flavour journey.

The pictures are somewhat blurry and the story is probably not nearly as amusing as witnessing the actual event, but I hope that this will make you smile at least a little...

Not your average berry...

What is this stuff?

Noooooooo.

Can't...handle...the...taste

What is wrong with these people?

Worst photo. Best face.

An Adventure Anniversary

"Would you like an adventure now, or shall we have tea first?"-Peter Pan

Exactly a year ago today, I spent my first day in Quesnel. Fondly called Q-town by its inhabitants, this strange little place has become quite dear to me.There is so much to say about this strange country, so many adventures to talk about. Perhaps the most entertaining aspects of this journey so far has been accents, cultural differences and various misconceptions about both South Africa and Canada.

During one of my first weeks in Quesnel, I spent a good amount of time with one of the girls I met at church. One night, as we sat talking about all sorts of things, she told me a rather sad story about some one she knew. I listened, interjecting, as any good South African would, at polite intervals with "shame". I was slightly confused by her look of shock each time I did, but I decided that I didn't know her well enough to understand her facial expressions. It was only a few months later that she told me that, because of my accent and the fact that Canadians do not use the word "shame" as a sympathetic sentiment, she thought I had been swearing.

We've shocked many people by informing them that South Africa does, in fact, have a winter. We, in turn, were pleasantly surprised by Summers that reach the 30s. Many of you know Tumi, my beautiful black sort of sister. I told a few girls at dancing that every first born in SA is born black. And they believed me.

One of many conversations with a random stranger went something like this...

"You have a British accent! Where is it from?"
"South Africa."
"Oh! I have a friend in South Africa!"
"Really. Where in South Africa?"
"Ghana."
-_-

The Canadian phrase "I don't care" is the equivalent of the South African "I don't mind". For quite a while I thought people were very apathetic and rude. Saying you will do something "just now" means right now, not in a few minutes, hours or days.
Robots are called traffic lights,crumpets are called pancakes and pancakes, crepes. The milk is gay, the crackers are high and the shower gel is quite a chop.

Homesickness and loneliness pestered me rather consistently in the beginning but I am now quite enjoying this new life. Even though all my plans of studying, working and getting married have all gone out the window, I'm finally able to look at my confusing little life not as a mess but as a grand adventure that is constantly changing. Happy one-year-in-a-foreign-country to me!

"I don' like that guy. He's a real douche.."-Nacho Libre

 -

Yep.

When they said BC had a drug problem, they weren't joking...

Dear Nobody,Letter #4

"I get a little bit bigger, but then I'll admit.I'm just the same as I was.Now don't you understand that I'm never changing who I am."- Imagine Dragons

28 February 2013

Dear Nobody,

I haven't written to you in about six months. I feel like there is so much to tell you, yet nothing comes to mind.The big changes that have taken place would be the obvious subject choice, but are also the least appealing. I've always been told that I am resistant to change even though my life, all life in fact, is ruled by change. I have gone through bigger changes than some over the past few years. Even though I would like to stop for a while, I cannot imagine my life any other way. As much as my life is constantly on the move, I feel as though I am not.

I think it's my biggest flaw, Nobody. My inability to change. Surely I'm not the only one who suffers from this particular downfall. Even people who are unhappy with their lives seem to hang onto who they are. Staying the same for as long as possible seems to be the safest thing to do. If you are suffering, at least the pain is familiar. Stepping out, try to change where you're at, is a big risk to take. Who knows what other dangers lie waiting for you. After all, it could be worse. 

You can easily justify such a character defect. It doesn't seem to be all that bad, as far as defects go. At least you aren't a drug addict. You don't kidnap innocent old ladies. You're not killing anyone, except maybe some part of yourself.  

You can convince yourself that change is simply unnecessary. One day we will cease to exist on this earth. We all become another piece of history. A pile of ashes or a box of bones, whichever you prefer.  Only those decisions that hold eternal weight will matter. Surely change can be restricted to the seasons, aging and, hopefully, our taste in clothes. That sounds good enough. You can be content with being stagnant. For a while.

Then, in spite of yourself, you start to think that maybe change is not such a bad thing. Maybe taking that leap of faith isn't quite as scary as you thought it was. And something inside you shifts ever so slightly. You can breathe a little easier; you feel a little more alive. It makes perfect sense really. As long as you are changing, you are growing. Once you stop growing, you start dying, or at very least, not living your life to the fullest. The idea of zombies becomes a little less ridiculous. Being alive has never been a strictly physical thing. What good is a body surging with life when it is inhabited by a dead soul? 

When we finally do change, I don't think it happens like a display of fireworks or an earthquake where all of a sudden we're this completely different person. I think it's smaller than that. It's the kind of thing no one else would even notice, unless they looked really closely. Which, thank goodness. they never really do.

But you notice the it. Inside you,that small change feels like a world of difference, and you hope that it is. It's better like this and you hope with everything you are that you get to be this person forever. That you'll never have to change again.

So you see, dear Nobody, everything has changed, yet nothing really has. I am essentially still me, although I do hope a better version of myself. I still do not want to change even though I know that I will be grateful after. Hopefully my ramblings will make you think, even for a second, about changing. In the greater scheme of things, it may not even matter. One day the world will go on without us and these little, seemingly insignificant changes won't even matter. But it matters right now. I know there will be people someday who say that we never existed but right now, we are alive. We're alive and growing. And it's because we are changing.

Forever yours (that will not change)

Me

The Day the World Didn't End

"Smile, it's the end of the world."-Matthew Palath

21 December 2012. The day the poor misunderstood  Mayans are accused of predicting to be the world's end. Anyone with half a will to investigate would find out that all they actually predicted the end of an era. They also did not account for the 514  leap years we've had in their calendars, the date their last rock ends on would actually have been some time in June. Or, as many a humorous cartoon relates,they merely ran out of space on their giant oreo cookies and everyone is being overly dramatic. I personally believe that if the Spanish hadn't wiped the Mayans out they would have finished their calendars

Despite all the predictions we did indeed survive the 21st and had Christmas after all. As the 31st approached, another misconception made a few people somewhat nervous. The popular movie 2012 made quite a few people think the end was nigh. What people seem to forget is that the world didn't actually end when the movie did. Everyone just somehow ended up in South Africa, where the Drakensburg and Cape Town somehow came together to create the perfect holiday destination. Really, that is not the end of the world.

Indeed it was not. Here we are on the first of January, alive and well. We survived 2012. I survived my first job, living in a boho cabin a minute from the beach, working as a photographer at a kid's camp 8 hours away from home. I survived living alone in a nice little granny flat. I survived my sister getting married and moving to Australia. I survived moving to Canada. I have almost survived my first winter.
We all survived apocalypse jokes and the sudden influx of zombie related everything. It was a close call, but we did survive the hashtag invasion on Facebook and the disturbingly large amount of fancy filtered photos of everyone's lunches,coffee mugs, feet and faces, thanks to Instagram.

Luckily, life is not all about merely surviving. In 2012 I completed three things off my bucket list. I went on an unpredictable trip, getting on a bus and then a metro train with only a vague idea of where I was going. I ended up getting a job and having, thus far, the very best time of my life living like a hippie in the small town of Zinkwazi in KwaZulu Natal. I was a camp counselor for a short while,then got promoted to photographer. I got paid to walk on the beach and take photos all day. While I was there I completed another item on my list: swimming to back-line. I could barely do anything but doggy paddle but one morning before the sun came up, four of my fellow counselors (three of which were life guards) and I walked down to the beach and plunged into the warm Indian ocean. As the sun came up, we reached back-line and floated in the now calm water. It was the most epic moment of my life.
 In July, I ticked off the third item, Go to Canada, when we moved to Quesnel.
I made a huge amount of unlikely friends.We started a youth group at church. I got my L. I may be a driver yet.
Last night I built a puzzle with my mother and went to bed at 1. Not the most exciting New Year's, but I've never gotten very excited about the new year. it is, after all, just another new day. All the same, Happy New Year cyber space. :)